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With my apologies to Will Shakespeare

biopic
I just watched the 1936 version of Romeo and Juliet with a 33 year old Juliet (Norma Shearer) and a 42(!) year old Romeo (Leslie Howard). Here’s an idea for an alternate ending. Romeo, in the tomb kneeling beside his beloved Juliette, holds up the vial of poison preparing to join her in death. Just as he raises it to his lips, she murmurs, “Romeo.” He winces and says, “My sweet Juliet, it’s as though I could still hear thy tender voice.”  A little louder, she says, “Romeo? Wherefore art thou?” (good lines are worth repeating) He looks down, sees her stirring, drops the vial and it shatters on the tomb floor. He flings himself upon her and smothers her with kisses. “How be this miracle possible?” he asks. The friar enters and warns them that the watch is approaching and they must make haste and escape. They quietly slip out as the friar heads off the watch. After all, this is a Romance, right? A happy ending is REQUIRED! Have I just committed sacrilege on Shakespeare?

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lee_rowan
Feb. 22nd, 2012 11:11 pm (UTC)
It makes as much sense as the original ending. I mean, honestly, Julie had been dead how long and she's still fresh as a daisy -- no maggots, no sunken eyes, no general decrepitude... and Romey didn't bother finding Friar L and asking WTF before barging into the crypt? The tragedy wasn't that they died, it was that Romeo was so stupid and precipitate.

Those two actors look more like the parents of Romeo & Juliet. Mr. Montague, meet Mrs Capulet.
markprobst
Feb. 22nd, 2012 11:16 pm (UTC)
Juliet wasn't dead! Don't you know it was a magic potion of some sort that simulates death!
lee_rowan
Feb. 23rd, 2012 01:11 am (UTC)
I KNOW! That's what I mean -- you can't "simulate" being dead for a week. Romeo had seen dead people before. If she had any body temp, if she was close enough to consciousness to wake up ten minutes after her hubby offed himself, she should have had a pulse.

Sorry, I do medical research when I nearly kill somebody.... this play has irritated me since I was about twelve. They weren't romantic, they were idiots.

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